Series 1 revealed how fear of the unknown could delay an individual’s ability to meaningfully cease opportunities that will make his/her life better. Brothers, know that lack of confidence, low self-esteem and undue delay in approaching a sister you’re led to, is dangerous. Speak Up!
“Ladies want you to speak the word, not act it and think they understand.” – Chiamaka Nsude
In approaching a sister there is no need for exaggerated words. Be simple, but strike the right cords. Put up an attitude of confidence as a scent of “no confidence” will see your manifesto dead on arrival. A brother should prepare beforehand for a YES or NO response as this will help reduce the side effects of a No, just if that’s the case.
“It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” – Theodore Roosevelt
There are brothers who are bold to approach all matters but for talking to the sister of their dreams. Fear is a cankerworm that must be completely eliminated in all endeavours. Fear of the unknown kills faster than any disease. When it comes to matters of the heart, fear breeds an environment for rejection to thrive.
“The true source of our suffering has been our timidity”
Every brother should get used to taking a NO in good faith irrespective of your love feelings. Learning to take NO is cool, but takes a mature mind to accept after some PUSH – suggesting when a sister says no to your manifesto declaration, you could still persist for a while. Nonetheless, wisdom is knowing when to move on without reducing your self-worth and pestering the sister in question.
“The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves.” – William Shakespeare, Julius Caesar
Furthermore, as a brother never come out so hard on yourself by wallowing in self-pity when your manifesto is greeted with a No. The future is always green. Hence, it is important to always go back to God who led you in the first place to know what next to do. And whatever He tells you to do, please do.
“If you dare nothing, then when the day is over, nothing is all you will have gained.” – Neil Gaiman
From series 2, it is worthy of note that there is always room for improvement. Brothers, never close your mind to new ideas when an idea fails. However, every idea should be applied in wisdom and balance. Never do anything for the fear of rejection, bur out of necessity.
Brothers, each time you approach a lady, know what your reasons are and stick with it. DON’T put yourself in a situation that portrays a man who keeps going to the stream to get water for a lady, and going to the farm to help her get firewood and expecting her to know what you had in mind. At that moment, you are only a cheerful giver.
Strike a balance! Human relationships should focus on the entirety. Every individual has a mind, body and soul; and if you focus on one aspect neglecting the others in the process, you’d simply have an imbalanced relationship.
It is good to be spiritual however, remember the Bible admonition of “here a little, there a little”. Avoid unnecessary disconnect. True, you want to make her happy but never try to impress her by always tilting to please her without her reciprocating. None reciprocation of your gestures is a bad signal. Learn to read the signs. Covert or overt, is very important. Right from the set go, know if the sister is into you.
It never takes long for a lady to a give a response to a brother she indeed loves. Never wait for too long. For me, a month may be the maximum. While you await her response, kindly keep stirring the stream of love in her heart to avoid it getting stale. Do her a poem if you’re good at that. In all, be yourself and do what you can do.
“A lady knows who she really loves because, who dey cry still fit see”
The review for Series 3, 4 & 5 will come up in the next post.